Hello! So I didn’t get a chance to write at all these past couple days, partially due to the fact that I’ve been pretty busy but also because I’ve been riding on this cloud 9 wave-level of high and I haven’t really felt the urge to write, per se. I’m still in disbelief over what’s occurred, and not a day has passed since Wednesday that I don’t read the messages that I sent and that he sent me. Especially the part where he asked me on a date. It’s right there in front of me, but I still can’t believe it.
I’m so curious to know what he thinks and how he feels. Was it too sudden? Was it totally out of the blue? Despite not saying so, did it kind of trip him out?
But I mean, he replied really, really nicely. He acknowledged both my honesty and bravery, which was sweet.
So, the date is set for this Thursday, and it’s currently Sunday night now. Which means I just have to get through three days before the actual day itself. I have no idea what to wear, and I keep bouncing back and forth between nervous and excited.
Also, I feel impatient.
Because when you know what you want, it’s hard to like… wait? When it seems to be within your grasp, I suppose. But I need the patience. Because we’re only just now going to really get to know one another. I know I’ve waited like half a year to tell him how I feel, but now is where we actually start learning to trust one another, to let one another in. So, that’s going to be a process in itself. I guess what I’m impatient for, is for it to begin. I want to know if he could learn to like me after getting to know all my little quirks and stuff. I want to see if he’ll actually start to let me in now, teach me things about himself that we never got a chance to talk about at work. The curiosity is fueling the impatience, but the knowledge that these things take time is quelling that burning curiosity.
No expectations as to how this is going to turn out, that’s my one thing. I didn’t have any when it came to his response, and I ended up being doubly happy as a result. I did my part, and now I’m going to go back to going with the flow and just, being myself. If he ends up liking me too, well that would be swell. If he doesn’t, well then that’s okay too. Because then I still end up having an amazing person in my life, even if it’s as a friend. We’ll see how things go! I’m honestly excited though, I really am.
Anyways, what did I miss writing about this past weekend?
Let’s see… I spent Friday with Leila and we watched Girl’s Trip (so fucking funny!) and then we also went Pokémon hunting, and had dinner, so Friday was an amazing day. And then Saturday was Cory’s birthday, and it was at a karaoke bar, and that was so, so much fun! All in all, it was an amazing weekend of this summer.
This week, I’ve got a lot to look forward to as well! Tomorrow (Monday), mom and I are going to the Caledon temple for some meditation (that should be a great start to this week), and then Tuesday, the FCL squad is going to Wonderland (that’s me, Leila and Avery) so that’ll be a fun reunion. Wednesday I work at my second job, and then I’ll probably end up spending the rest of the evening figuring out just exactly what I’m going to wear for Thursday, LOL. I can’t wait! And then it’s back to work at my regular job for the rest of the weekend.
Which reminds me – when I see Dylan this Thursday, I’m going to have to find a way to tell him that he nearly got fired this past week. Yikes. That’s going to be an interesting conversation. I know he hates the job and doesn’t really take it too seriously (and neither do I in all honesty), but the only reason I wouldn’t want him to have the job is if he ever voluntarily left it; I don’t want it to be taken away from him over petty department politics, because that would suck. So, I’m just going to give him a simple head’s up and leave it at that.
Anyways, that’s about it for this log! I’m so, so looking forward to everything this week has to offer. It’s going to be a good one, I can feel it! Now, if I could only get myself to stop daydreaming every five minutes about Thursday… sigh. Gah. Life is nuts, isn’t it? But in the best ways possible, if you make it so.
Love, love, love,