Day 247, 248, 249 – September 4th, 5th & 6th

Hello, hello! So it’s currently Wednesday, September 6th, and it’s also pretty much the very, very last day of this summer vacation! I suppose it’s only fitting that today’s the day that I go back to my summer list and finally knock off the things I did, one by one. Holy crap, I’m SOOO excited for this new chapter of my life! But before I talk about that, let’s look back at that list now:

Summer 2017 Bucket List

  1. Sleep beneath the stars.
    2. Spend some time at the cottage with your favourite people.
    3. Do my driving lessons, in class & on road.
    4. Proceed to get my G2, within this summer.
    5. Get a second job, work more hours to make money so that I can save for school (and myself).

    6. Go back to Chainsaw in Waterloo and sing a sappy, romantic love ballad.
    7. Go on road trips. (Friends AND family!)
    8. Figure out what I really want from life.
    9. Finally get that feeling of being “back on track”.
    10. Go camping.
    11. Roast marshmallows on a fire.
    12. Go swimming as much as I can, anywhere.
    13. Go fishing, (and maybe get my own fishing rod).
    14. Adventure around downtown late at night/all night.
    15. Spend as much time as I can with the people I love.
    16. Leave the country; explore another one, if financially possible.
    17. Try new food and new food places as much as I can.
    18. Go to a baseball game.
    19. Start running/working out more, be more active.
    20. Read as many books as I can, all kinds.
    21. Movie marathon: Pirates of the Caribbean
    , Harry Potter, Lord of the Rings, maybe even Star Wars if I can get through it.
    22. Take a moment, if not every day then at least 4-5 times a week, to meditate and breathe.
    23. Start painting again.

    24. Upload more photos to my makeup Instagram.
    25. Enjoy morning tea/barbecues/family time out on our patio.
    26. Host another patio party.
    27. Visit everyone at their universities this summer.
    28. Do another trip like Montreal or Niagara with the fam-squad.
    29. Laugh and find joy in every moment that I can; be spontaneous.
    30. Stop documenting every moment of my life on social media. Use it less.
    31. Be fearless. Do something that fear was holding me back from doing.
    32. Dance in the rain.
    33. Say what you mean, and mean what you say.
    34. Go out and have crazy nights where you barely remember anything (but responsibly, too).

    35. Listen to new music.
    36. Swim in a lake, by yourself.

    37. Learn how to do something totally new, teach yourself.
    38. Continue to fall in love with yourself, as deeply as you can.
    39. Forgive yourself and get past the guilt you have towards yourself, have more self-compassion.
    40. Make time for yourself and the things you enjoy doing.
    41. Go on a date. (If/when you’re ready to).
    42. Take yourself out on a date (i.e. movie/dinner/AGO/ROM).
    43. Get a gym membership, and then try yoga if it’s available to you.
    44. Finish and hand in your petition.
    45. Put the Christmas lights back up in your room, and then on the patio.
    46. Build a blanket fort and spend the entire day in bed.
    47. Go to Scarborough Bluffs.
    48. Go to Sauble, Wasaga and one other beach you’ve never been to before.
    49. Tell a certain someone how you feel (when/if the timing is right).
    50. Enjoy every single moment that this summer has to offer, as though it were your last.

I struck out all the things I did or even partially did, and wow. I can’t stop smiling right now! I’ve done so much of it, and I’m so, so happy and proud of myself!! I’m going to go through some, if not most, of these goals and attach them to particular memories. Let’s see…

“Sleep beneath the stars”. Well, the last trip I took with my family, we slept outside of the cottage beneath the stars. We were in a tent of course, but I still consider that to be outside. Especially in the moment where I actually lied down on the picnic table near the tent outside and just looked up at the stars, and marvelled at their beauty. Sigh. I love star-gazing. And speaking of the cottage…

“Spend some time at the cottage with your favourite people.” I was lucky and blessed to get two instances to do this – once at Cathy’s cottage with my good friends from work, and the second time was that last summer trip with the family. It was during these trips that I got to knock other amazing things off my list, such as “roasting marshmallows on a fire”, and “swimming by myself in a lake.” I even “went fishing”! Dylan, Milan and I took turns fishing during the morning while we were all at the cottage, which was super fun. Between these trips and also finding time to hang out with Leila almost every week his summer, I definitely knocked off “spending as much time as I can with the people I love” this summer as well.

“Get a second job, work more hours to make money so that I can save for school (and myself).” I DID IT! I spent a majority of this summer going back and forth between two jobs and grew to love the feeling of being as productive as possible. I’ve got to admit – working at my second job has truly improved my work ethic and my sense of responsibility. Not only that, I was praised highly for everything I did there, by multiple people on multiple occasions. It was truly such a blessing to be hired and to work for such an establishment. I get why they’re one of the best companies to work for – the people are incredible. The job came to me at time that I myself didn’t even realize I needed it most. It solidified my faith and confidence in myself, and my capabilities. As a result of being able to work both jobs and work them well, I now know more than ever, what I am capable of. I’m so truly happy and humbled.

“Adventure around downtown late at night/all night.” I did, and it was one of the best and most insightful nights of my entire life. I met Sanjeev, I learnt about the nature of synchronicity and how nothing is coincidence, my spirituality grew and I had so, so much fun just walking about downtown in the middle of the night. There truly is nothing like adventure. Not only that, this was one of the nights that I “tried new food and new food places as much as I can”, (although the new food places was definitely a bucket list goal that I knocked off with Leila, 98% of this summer hehe). Also, I accomplished the “take yourself out on a date” goal this night too, but also in multiple different occasions this summer! I watched movies by myself in theatres, took myself out to dinner, did things on my own. Safe to say, I’ve finally become comfortable (actually, more than comfortably – truly happy), with my own company this summer and it feels amazing.

“Read as many books as I can, all kinds.” This is one of my favourite goals that I accomplished this summer, because it led to a lot of growth and learning for me. The books that I’ve read this summer have contributed to who I am and who I’m becoming in ways that I can never forget or unlearn, and I couldn’t be happier. It’s because of these books that I can confidently say that I “continued to fall in love with myself, as deeply as I could”, and “figured out what I really want from life” and “finally got that feeling of being “back on track”” (as a result of reading the “Monk Who Sold His Ferrari”.) Even “taking a moment to meditate and breathe” came about as a result of reading these books! Safe to say, I’ve been truly blessed by the wisdom that made its way into my life as a result of the books I’ve read.

“Leave the country; explore another one, if financially possible.” I got to go on a wild, spontaneous trip to Las Vegas which was not only a summer bucket list goal but a life and travel bucket list goal! Hands down it was one of the best trips I’ve ever got to take in my life, and I’m so happy that that manifested for me. I definitely got to “laugh and find joy in every moment that I could; be spontaneous” because of this trip, but also in many other instances throughout this summer. I also spontaneously agreed to go on a date with someone I had just met! Which knocks off the “go on a date. (If/when you’re ready to)” goal off of my list. And it was an amazing date for sure – I met someone whose vibration I aspire to be on, and it led to a conversation I will definitely never, ever forget.

And lastly, I did something that knocked a whole bunch of goals off in one go: “Be fearless. Do something that fear was holding me back from doing”, “Say what you mean, and mean what you say” were both knocked off because I finally “told a certain someone how I feel.” To this day, I’m still in awe of how fearlessly I went about telling Dylan about my feelings. After months and months of holding back due to fear of the unknown, I finally let it all out and said everything I wanted to say. And for a little while there, I struggled between second-guessing it and fearing what could happen as a result, but I’m finally in a place where I couldn’t be happier that I did what I did. I still read what he replied to me that day and smile in the exact same way that I did when I first read it, in all honesty. And because I faced my fears and told him, he asked me out on a date (which went amazingly well), and now we’re set for a second one. If I hadn’t of told him how I felt about him, he would have NEVER KNOWN! He said himself I wasn’t obvious in any way, and I would have spent even more time wondering why nothing was happening. I took my fate into my own hands with the help (and guidance, and nudges) from the universe.

I still don’t know what’s going to happen when it comes to this but I’m absolutely okay with that! And more than anything, I’m excited for whatever could be! I love that we’re still getting to know one another; this whole process has been so much fun and more than anything, I’m happy that we seem to be getting closer in our friendship too. Dylan is such a rare and amazing person, truly I don’t think I’ve ever met anyone quite like him and that fact enthralls me. And there’s still so much more to learn, despite getting to know each other along the course of this past year as well. I can’t wait to see what time will bring about for this, for us, no matter what things may end up becoming.

And so, I truly believe that I “enjoyed every single moment that this summer had to offer, as though it were my last.” And what an incredible, fun, laughter-filled, life-changing, soul-enriching, memorable and growth-inducing summer it was, as a result. My soul, my heart, my mind and my self could not be any happier. Or you know, I could be, but that’s yet to come with this new chapter that I am equally excited for.

School begins tomorrow and now there’s a whole new set of goals I would like to accomplish for myself this upcoming year. Doing well in school is definitely my top most priority, but now I will be starting my driver’s lessons – I definitely want to be driving before this year comes to an end. I definitely need to finally tie things together for my petition and hand it in. I want to make sure I’m doing well when it comes to my new position at work, but most of all I want to make sure that I’m making time for myself and my mental wellbeing, by keeping up with my meditations and breathing.

I believe in myself more than I ever have in my twenty-four years of living. I have so much more faith in both myself and this universe, than I ever have at any given point in my life. I know that literally every part of my life will be exactly what I hope for it to be – I just have to work towards it, in every way that I can.  

I know I’m so used to saying “I can’t wait” when I get excited, but you know what? I can wait. Because, I want to truly experience every moment that I encounter, be thankful, and let it pass as it does. There are so many more beautiful, growth-inducing moments to come. I want to truly be present in each and every moment that I am blessed with, as time passes on. So, I can wait.

Well, I have to start getting ready for my last hurrah of this summer – a launch party that my whole department will be attending. So excited! This is the perfect way to end off what was an incredible summer, for sure. Tomorrow, after class, I will sit down and compile a brand new goals list and truly get even more organized for this upcoming year. But for now? Time to have some fun.

I just want to take this brief moment to express my deepest and most sincere gratitude for everything I’ve been blessed with this past year. The self-love, the opportunities I’ve received, the wisdom, the love of my family and friends, the amazingly beautiful moments that I will never forget and will always cherish, the growth, the quiet moments of peace, the crazy laughter-filled moments of fun. I am grateful. I am blessed and humbled. My heart is so full.

I know the universe will be on my side for tomorrow, and for always. And you know who else is on my side now, after all of this time?

Me.

It’s going to be an amazing new chapter.

Until tomorrow,

Love always and in every way,

Me.

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