Day 8 + 9 – January 8th & 9th, 2020

Hello! I didn’t get a chance to write yesterday because I went straight from work to Adrian’s. I’m going to keep this short and sweet today, because… well, just because.

There’s a lot of sadness and fear permeating the air these days. A lot of stuff on the news that I can’t help but take in, and I spent a lot of today with this churning pit of anxiety in my stomach. It’s hard not to hold onto fear sometimes with everything that’s going on.

But I don’t want to live with it and let it dictate my life. I understand what’s going on, I understand the gravity of it all. But I have to keep shining my light into this world – it’s the only way to make anything better. I have to be a light worker, like the author of the book I’m reading says. Doing my part is all I can do and it has to be enough, some way, some how.

Writing really does help though. I’m glad I’ve started doing this again, and my gratitude journal is also a wonderful solace. Especially because I can look back and see all the things I have to be grateful for, and it’s so much. Thank you, thank you Universe, always. Gratitude and appreciate help to combat the fear and worry. I promised myself that this year, I wouldn’t spend another day living in anxiety or worry and I have to do my part to make it so. I can talk the talk but it won’t make any difference unless I walk the walk too.

So I’m going to meditate tonight, and be more diligent about that. I’m sure it’ll make a world of a difference. Also my breathing has been helping a lot – whenever I start to notice the anxiety, I just take a really deep, full breath right into my stomach and it helps to ease the knots.

Anyways!! Olivia came back today, and we spent this entire day catching up about her trip and everything’s she’s missed while she was gone. It’s so nice to have her back, I missed her soooooo much! It almost feels as though she never left now, hehe.

Life’s what you make it. Tomorrow, I’m going to wake up and be energized and happy and be thankful that I get to wake up at all. It’s going to be a good day because I want it to be, because I know it will be.

Wow, I’m already feeling loads better. Life is good. It’s better than good, it’s amazing. Everything is working out exactly as it is meant to in perfect timing. You are blessed and you are loved. Love right back, just as hard. You got this.

Anyways, I’m going to play some Mario Kart now until I’m sleepy heh. Adrian got it for me for Christmas and I haven’t stopped playing since, it’s so addictive!

Until tomorrow,

Love always and so whole-heartedly,

Me.

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