Day 37 – February 6th, 2020

I’ve finally returned to work and it’s an interesting… lesson, or teaching moment, I guess, trying to be happy where I am right now, LOL. This mall is so cold, and boy am I ever missing the heat of the sun on my skin, le sigh. It’s also very quiet and dead at work so I’m basically trying not to tear my hair out of my head due to boredom. There’s not even work to do, so I have no choice but to pace and engage in idle chit-chat with whomever is around.

Let’s see if I can try to be grateful in this situation. What’s the bright side about being here? 

Well… I’m currently getting paid to sit here at this Starbucks and write this log, so that’s one thing. Not to mention, work or no work, I’m also still getting paid. So, even if I am just pacing and talking to people, I’m making money, and that’s a pretty sweet deal minus the boredom right? And sometimes those conversations can turn into pretty deep thought-provoking discussions about good versus bad, or mental health, morality, so on and so forth. 

When I look at it that way, the boredom isn’t all too bad. I’d rather be bored at work and get paid as it is than be working at a job that compromises my mental/physical health and I come home exhausted and drained everyday. 

So there! That’s the bright side. Doing your best to choose a different perspective really can make a world of a difference. 

Anyways, my break is heading into the hour territory, which means I should probably be heading back LOL. I’ll continue this when I get home! I just wanted to make sure I had something substantial for today’s log, just in case I didn’t get a chance to write later. 

Be right back! 

…and I’m baaaack. Home now, so thankfully it wasn’t that bad of a shift.  

So as I’m working on my book, I’m piecing things together by going through my old logs right? And it’s bringing up all these old memories and feelings. Some good, some nostalgic. It’s so vivid though, which makes me happy. This is probably one of the biggest things in my life that I must have the utmost patience for. I’m so excited to get to the end result because I can see it all in my head so clearly, but I know with all my heart that this is a process that I can’t rush through. 

It’s all going to come together on it’s own. I’m just, so so so sos so sosoo so so excited to hold the final product in my hands the way I can see it in my head. Le sigh. 

Anyways, I think that’s about everything for today. I didn’t really get to talk about how January ended and February began, but I’m looking forward to everything this new month has in store. Hopefully we receive a brief respite from all this growing discord that 2020 has brought thus far. 

I keep looking at my skin so happily, it’s so full of sun and warmth, sigh. I want to go for a longer trip on my next destination I think. Really settle into it. We should be finding out soon whether we won that Italy trip though so… we’ll see what the Universe has in store for us. 

Until tomorrow!

Love always and endlessly, 

Me.

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