Day 47, 48, 49 – February 16th to 18th, 2020

Hello! It’s been an absolutely amazing long weekend, and I’m happy to report that I’m feeling refreshed, centered, and quite at peace. I have this drive to start making things happen, which I know means that I have to get back on top of my writing, and also my gratitude journal as well. Those have to be everyday habits – it’s what my soul is asking for now. Hooray for forming proper habits! 

I have so much I want to talk about!!! I definitely want to catch up about this past weekend because it was absolutely incredible. And then I want to do a good self catch-up because it’s been awhile. Okay, go!

Alright, so this past weekend – my test run of the “opium den” was a success! (*disclaimer* not actually an opium den, just what I’ve nick-named it hehe). So I had turned my den/dining room into a lounge area by hanging table cloths as curtains at the doorway and window-like opening in the kitchen so that it was completely secluded and closed off, laid a straw mat on the floor along with plush pillows for everyone to sit on, and turned the corner of the room into a spiritual shrine complete with incense, my himalayan salt lamp, my diffuser, my crystal collection, candles, and my sage. I’m telling ya, the vibes in this little area were amazing. 

Once everyone was over, we caught up with what we’ve missed in each other’s lives, got into discussions about the universe and quantum leaping and astral projection and intuition and so much more, we pulled oracle cards to see what the Universe was trying to tell us, and once we all had our messages, we began to paint while listening to a forest soundtrack overlapped with binaural beats. 

For a moment, I stopped and just felt everyone’s collective vibration as everyone began to paint. It was pure magic. It was harmony, it was the melding of frequencies that truly vibed perfectly together to create an atmosphere of creativity and pure good energy. My heart and soul were so happy, and I felt so elevated in everyone’s presence. That’s what I’ve always wanted. That’s the kind of energy that I need in my life, the flow that feels so incredibly easy and right. 

We painted for hours, laughed together, talked intermittently, just enjoyed the process and enjoyed each other’s company. Eventually once we all finished painting, we started playing jackbox games altogether on the tv until about 2 in the morning before everyone crashed. 

It was soooo much fun. It’s been awhile since I did like a get-together/sleepover at my house (I’ve been hibernating mostly) but it reminded me how fun it can be to share my energy with the right people under the right circumstances. Winter can make it difficult to see the ones you care about, but I found a way and everything clicked into place like an easy-peasy puzzle. 

The Sunday after, Krystal and Chad came back for some lunch and the conversations continued with Radha and I. I’m so glad that the four of us vibe so well together. We all have something different to bring to the table, and we all have differing perspectives that allow us to teach one another, and the most important thing we all share in common is a wonderfully open mind. That’s what I love the most. 

I’m glad I manifested exactly what I hoped for in terms of my friendships thus far. I’m open to whomever else is meant to be a part of my life or our lives as well – our little group on Saturday night consisted of eight people and those eight people (including le me) vibed perfectly. I’m good with this squad, and I’m looking forward to the cottage trips and summer hangouts and everything else we’ll get to do this year altogether!

Speaking of exciting things this year – Chad and Krystal are officially moving in together! Possibly by the end of this year, and if not then definitely the beginning of next. I have a feeling that it’ll definitely be this year, just a gut feeling I have. I’m SOOOOOOOOOOOO excited for them, they’re legit my fave couple ever ever and I wish they had a youtube channel because they’d be the only youtube couple I’d ever watch LOOOOL. 

I also can’t wait to hang out at their place, Krystal has such awesome visions for how they’d like their place to look and I can already see it in my head. And Chad said that he wants the place to be bumpin’, just people coming by all the time and hanging out. It’s going to be awesome! They’re the first of my friends that I know to be moving out and adulting for reals. 

Speaking of moving out – I was telling Adrian about how Chad and Krystal are moving out together, how it’s a three bedroom apartment for a really, really good price, and how I’m so incredibly excited for them. And he did it again, he made a “joke” suggestion that he and I should move out together, move into their spare room and split the rent with them. I jokingly agreed that we totally should and it would be so cool, but in my head I was doing happy dances. First he talked about us moving to Aruba together, and now this! (TBH – it would legit be so effing cool to live with Chad and Krystal. In a dream world, I think we’d be the perfect roomies since we all get along so well together and our double date vibes are amazing. But, this is basically their next step before getting married so I doubt they’d want roomies LOL. Nevertheless, we shall definitely be over quite often once they’re all settled in!) 

But honestly, I shouldn’t be too surprised I suppose. On an average week, I spend about 4-5 nights at his house, even if it’s just for the night and I return home to get ready for work. I sleep at my own home maybe once or twice a week now, since I’m over at his so much. I’ve basically moved in, LOL. He’s even suggested that I keep stuff at his place so I don’t have to worry about carrying too much stuff with me! 

Nevertheless, it all makes me so happy. Happy that we’ve only been seeing each other for almost two years, and we’re both seemingly on the same page when it comes to how we feel about one another and how often we like seeing each other. I definitely think we’d cohabitate well – we’ve already gone on three trips and every single trip has been incredible, and now I’m over at his place so much it’s almost as though we already do live together. I know his habits and I know how to respect them, and in fact I adore how cleanly and organized he likes things (making sure his room is clean and his bed is made before he leaves, etc). I think if we lived together, he’d probably be an amazing influence on me if anything LOL.

All in due time. I know what I want when it comes to this and comes to us, and I’m glad that I’m noticing these little moments that show me he’s seeing a future with me too, however subtle they may be. 

Anyways, moving on! So Sunday was a lazy day, and so was most of Monday, but Adrian and I came back from his place to mine so that we could have dinner with my family for Family Day. It was really nice, I love that our little family of four has expanded to a family of seven now that Ben and Seb are with us and Dasuni too. 

And that’s the weekend! Valentine’s Day Friday, hanging out with my friends Saturday/Sunday, and Family Day dinner on Monday (yesterday). All in all, it was the perfect balance of going out and staying in. 

Not to mention, I was off from work the whole entire weekend so it was almost like a mini-vacay. I’m glad, I love the long stretch of days off from work because it does give me some time to detach from all the negativity and discourse that that job entails. 

I went back to work today and it wasn’t too bad! I just need to be a bit more careful with the schedule next month because I basically gave myself every single weekend off this month and it did not go unnoticed, hehehe. It is what it is though! I will do what I can where I can and however I can, muahahahhaaaaa. 

These past two months have been wonderful. Cutting down my hours has shown me that it is indeed possible to reprioritize and make sure that my job is not taking up all my time, energy and efforts. I know Anna wants me to work more come March, but I don’t think I’ll do more than four days a week. It’s more than enough for me. I like how distant and detached I’ve become with this job. I come in, do what I have to do, and leave with no further thoughts. 

I don’t want to lose my work ethic or my work habits though, because I’m good at what I do. So I have to find a balance where I’m detached like this, but not so detached that I don’t care enough to do what my role expects of me. The middle way, as always! I’m sure I’ll figure it out. 

Speaking of middle way – I know that we’ve just entered a mercury retrograde, but I don’t feel chaotic or off-kilter. In fact, I have this urge to clean up, declutter, get back on track with my book, writing and meditation, and I’m motivated to be organized and more in touch with myself. My faith is as strong as ever and underlies most of the thoughts I do have, so I’ve been pretty at peace on a day-to-day basis, It’s just nice to know that I don’t have to worry about anything because I know I’m being taken care of on some level, and on the level directly relating to myself too. I’m listening and looking for the signs, talking to the Universe as much as I can, and just going with the flow right now. 

I also know that the Universe is giving me a little push. I can feel it – I have this restless energy like, I have to do something. I know this feeling, I’ve experienced it before. I just don’t know what the “it” is, just yet. I know I’ll know when I know. It’ll reveal itself in a sudden impulse, a calm decision that seems clear as day and relatively easy to make with no questioning whatsoever. I’m looking forward to it, whatever it may be. 

In the meanwhile – I must declutter, I must return to my creative outlet (writing, and perhaps painting more!), I must start meditating again (guided meditations, breath-counting meditations, etc.) and get back to organizing my book. Sometimes little passages come to me in my head regarding certain chapters and I don’t write them down or anything, but clear as day this is all coming together (even if it is mostly in my head for the time being). I can’t wait to write in cute little cafes in the spring and summer and let the sun inspire me. Ou and on my patio too! 

THANK YOU UNIVERSE FOR ALL THAT I HAVE AND ALL THAT YOU BLESS ME WITH! 

Anything else I’d like to talk about? Yes, I’d like to discuss: more goals for myself regarding what I’d like to start learning about, (maybe podcasts?), the book that found me that I’m currently in the midst of reading, how I’d like to learn to enjoy my time with Adrian whilst still making the most of my time, anddddd… ah yes, this new idea for an “intuition journal”! Also connected to the book that I’m reading but something I’d like to discuss nonetheless. 

I shall save that for my next log because ya girl is STARVING and needs to eat. Lesson of this log?

Nothing quells fear better than active faith, trust and patience in the process. When I say “active” faith, I mean that you have to be active in it. You have to act in it – everything you do, say, and think must be consciously rooted in faith, without that underlying current of fear. When fear goes, “but what if”, faith must cut in and say, “everything that is unfolding is for my highest good, no matter what, and I am always, always being taken care of, one way or another”. 

Always choose the better thought. That’s how rewiring works. And one day, before you know it, you wake up and realize that faith is always the first thought in your mind, and fear is becoming a distant memory. 

That’s all for today! Great log, great log. Hehe. 

Love always and infinitely, 

Me.

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